Sabriya's Hope Writing Journal 13

I wish I could be making movies instead of writing novels. But novels are possible, and movies are not, when there is little money. I have a thirst for visuals. When Pam and I watch movies at home, lately about three/week, she's all a tizzy about the emotional storyline, and I'm in awe of the art director's imagination, the blocking, and the L O N G one-take opening sequences (e.g. Touch of Evil).

Writing Sabriya was getting me down. I wanted to SEE my characters and the settings. But my imagination struggles to create art, although I don't have much trouble with wordy descriptions.  But then, I'm now Lew Wallace (Ben Hur), whose command of English and scene setting is mesmerizing. 

I don't use AI to write. I want what I create to be my creation, although research and synonym finders I can't do without. But AI has helped me test my descriptions. I started out with Microsoft Copilot (because we have a Microsoft Office subscription).

But after I write a scene, I'm always wondering how it will translate visually in the reader's mind...or on screen if I should be so lucky. Copilot and lately ChatGPT have made writing a bit more fun for my right brain. Here are some examples where I've taken my word description and asked one or the other AI system what it would look like, though I am humble enough to realize the AI rendering is more Lew Wallace than me. 

Sabriya discovers a safe haven:
St. Mary Elias Monastery

Miwi Cun village where Sabriya's
secret daughter was raised

Sabriya races through the night on her
 MI6 stealth cycle

Doffing her Carmelite lay habit for a
true wedding dress

Sapptoso watches Sabriya give a speech
 as he plans her demise

Sabriya and Hannah, her security attache,
 discuss royal protocol

Sabriya asks David for forgiveness

ChatGPT's vs Grok's answer to: "What is The Moral Premise?"

Here is ChatGPT's output for:
"What is The Moral Premise?"

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The Moral Premise is a storytelling concept that describes the core ethical idea your story is testing—the belief about how people should act and what happens when they do or don’t.

Put simply:

The Moral Premise states that certain behavior leads to certain consequences.

It’s not the plot, not the theme, and not the message you preach— it’s the cause-and-effect spine underneath everything.

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A Clear Formula

Most moral premises can be phrased like this:

“If a character embraces X (virtue or flaw), the result will be Y (reward or punishment).”

Examples:

• “Selfishness leads to isolation; generosity leads to love.”

• “Pride leads to downfall; humility leads to wisdom.”

• “Fear leads to control; trust leads to freedom.”

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Why It Matters

The Moral Premise:

• Guides character decisions

• Shapes the ending (earned, not random)

• Keeps the story emotionally honest

• Prevents the story from feeling hollow or accidental

Great stories prove their moral premise through action, not speeches.

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Classic Examples

• Macbeth: Unchecked ambition leads to self-destruction.

• Pride and Prejudice: Humility and self-awareness lead to love.

• The Godfather: Loyalty to power destroys family and soul.

• Star Wars (OT): Compassion redeems; hatred consumes.

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Moral Premise vs Theme (Important Difference)

• Theme = what the story is about (love, power, faith, corruption)

• Moral Premise = what the story argues about that theme

Theme is a topic.
Moral premise is a judgment.

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In Your Kind of Stories

Given the worlds you build—faith, secrecy, power, love across cultures—your moral premises might sound like:

• Respect creates belonging; domination creates ruin.

• Love rooted in humility survives power and fear.

• Secrecy corrodes the soul unless redeemed by truth.

You don’t have to state it.
If the story works, the reader feels it.

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The following paragraph is also from ChatGPT courtesy of Jefffrey from WV. He was tweaking ChatGPT about The Moral Premise and Natural Law and ended up with this  good articulation:

The “Moral Premise,” popularized by Stanley D. Williams, is a concise, propositional statement that links inner character truth to outer plot consequences. Formally, it pairs a vice with defeat and a corresponding virtue with success, e.g., “Self-protective deception leads to isolation, but sacrificial truth-telling leads to authentic communion.” It should undergird every major structural beat: shaping protagonist choices, antagonistic pressure, escalation, and resolution. Properly used, it unifies theme and plot, prevents arbitrary incident, and ensures that character arc, external stakes, and narrative causality all express the same moral logic.

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Here is Grok's output for:
"What is the Moral Premise?"

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The Moral Premise is a key storytelling concept developed by Stanley D. Williams (often referred to as Stan Williams), detailed in his 2006 book The Moral Premise: Harnessing Virtue and Vice for Box Office Success.

It refers to the core psychological, spiritual, or moral truth at the heart of a successful story—particularly in films, but applicable to novels, plays, and other narratives. Williams argues that commercially and critically successful stories are built around a consistent moral premise rooted in true moral values, which guides every element: character arcs, plot points, scenes, dialogue, and even visual choices.

The premise is essentially what the story is "really" about on a deeper level (beyond the surface plot or "dramatic premise"), and it connects with audiences because it reflects natural law or universal truths about human behavior and consequences.

Formal Structure of a Moral Premise

Williams presents it as a dual cause-and-effect statement with four key parts:

• A vice (a moral flaw or negative trait)
• Leading to defeat (undesirable consequences, failure, suffering)
• But a virtue (the opposing positive trait)
• Leading to success (desirable consequences, victory, fulfillment)

The classic format is:

[Vice] leads to [defeat], but [Virtue] leads to [success].

Examples

• From Braveheart: "Compromising liberty leads to tyranny, but dying for liberty leads to freedom."
• Common in many hits: Stories show characters pursuing vice and suffering defeat until (or if) they embrace virtue and achieve success (or tragic failure if they don't).

Why It Matters

• The moral premise acts as the "true pilot" of the story, ensuring consistency and resonance.
• Williams' research on box-office successes shows that films aligning every beat with this premise perform better.
• It helps writers avoid disjointed plots, overcome writer's block, and create meaningful, audience-connecting narratives.
• It's not preachy; it's subtly dramatized through character choices and outcomes.

This concept builds on ideas from ancient sources (Plato, Aesop, the Bible) and modern theorists like Lajos Egri, but Williams makes it practical for screenwriting and modern storytelling.

If you're writing or analyzing a story, starting with a clear moral premise can unify everything. Williams' own site (stanwilliams.com) and book expand on this with examples from films like A Beautiful Mind, Die Hard, and more.